This Stone

the size of a stone smoothed
turning over
in my throat
a gauge of pain
i cough to clear the betrayal
i cough to clear the lies
the weight of this stone
a sparkplug
a grapefruit
a boulder
no the size of this Stone
a lozenge not fitted enough

Worth places

i have placed my worth in very few hands
and today was a whipping
as he rests sweetly
extended one hand
I’m choking
and leaking
a bad robot a misplaced charm
and squeezing myself smaller
into a new type
less dependent
something toothed and growling
a scampering grown weary in my heart
an innocence skinned and left to dry in the sun



Tonight you’re weaker
shadows pool under your eyes
purple and blue
you never know how to whisper
always using your vocal cords
but tonight
you’re tired
sloping shoulders slipping over the table until your face nearly touches dinner
you’re whispering
truly whispering
about how hard things will be the next few months
salting your meal with tears

A Long, Long Time Ago

I rode shotgun in your sedan
full of squirrels
and we’d argue about who was better
Byron or Keroauc
on the road
we’d dissect movies
drink impossible amounts of coffee
and smoke back when i smoked
cigars for you, reds for me
we dreamed up books and shows
and laughed ourselves sideways
in the booths of the restaurants we closed
and i loved you
how i loved you. but when you asked
all i could do was laugh
because she was out there somewhere perfect to your perfect
and i was destined to be
if not a sister
my dear, dear brother
we both know we were Long lost twins
carried up a ravine
and given to good folk
and look at you
happy and succeeding
with her
and look at me. the same
and still able to talk to each other often all these years
because I’m not an ex
just a crazy good friend who always has your back
a sister from heaven’s days

Talk To Me Again

How is it that what you love
you do not study?
when i study your face without thinking
or the ship lanes in your hands
i study the wrinkles of your worry
and of your astonishment
fine is by a lifted eyebrow
and downturned lip when i ask
you hate when i ask
not fine is when your face remains blank
how is it you do not study what you love?
when i study the high arches of your feet and how it puts a swing into your walk
how your toes dusted with hair curl when you’re concentrating
and all you can say to me
to me
tell me


As I cross the bridge to you
stranger that i am
though once we were bound
i give my heart and soul
do not run i beg you
it’s a messy lot
because of you
a bit disorganized since that day
but true
you know that don’t you
in the distance just there
i can see your breath mingle with the fog
as I cross the bridge to you
unbalanced shifting recovering again and again from fall
stranger that i am
embrace me should i reach your shoulder
clutch my hand if i can go no further along the swallowing bricks
and tell me once
you loved me

Swing Dancing

Swing dancing Saturday nights
All rusted out of me
Your hands coarse and throwing me rough
Listening to you bawl in the car when I tried to break up
How you didn’t like my laugh
Called it unladylike
Then redressed me
And pouted when I wore the same outfit twice
Still you could throw a tall chick high
And catch her coming down
It was all the in-between
That ruined you and me